Friday, February 12, 2010

Isaiah 40

I've always been convinced that Isaiah was a girl...
Ok, maybe not really. But when I read that book, I can certainly see how females are made in the image of God as much as males are. God is VERY emotional in this book! I love to read it. I could go on a spill about this for a while, but the point of this post is to tell you how much I've learned about being a mom from Isaiah 40.

This chapter came to my attention by means of one of my wonderful God loving students, Rachel Williams. One day last summer while I was still pregnant, she sent me a text with v.11 in it. "He will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart. He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young." Of course this was such a great blessing to me. I carried it with me for many months to come.

Ok, now flash forward a few months, and I'm nursing a beautiful little infant. Struggling as all moms do with the trials of nursing. I return to this verse, but this time it is not the last line that hits me, but the first two: "I will feed my lambs...holding them close to my heart"...is this not the picture of a nursing mother!?!?! I was floored! I still am!!! To think that my God knows and understands the struggles of nursing. MY GOD, who has always been portrayed as a man, without the characteristics or experiences of a woman. (Well, I was going to try to avoid this controversy...but I don't think I can state the full effect of this verse without mentioning it.) HE CAN UNDERSTAND my female struggles. I've come to understand this from a textbook/theoretical manner in the past few years, but this hit me as a reality. Nursing is truly the one thing women can do that men can not and never will be able to do. And my God, always portrayed as a man, understands it. Well, with all the surges of hormones in my new mom body, you can imagine how many tissues it took to clean up the effects of that verse.

Now maybe a month later...I'm still stuck in this chapter. Tempie is about three months old and for some reason I'm getting nervous about her eating. I think she may not be getting enough. I move on slowly to v.12 "Who else has held the oceans in his hand? Who has measured off the heavens with his fingers? Who else knows the weight of the earth or has weighed out the mountains and the hills?" For those of you who have not nursed, one of the greatest struggles of nursing is wondering if your baby is getting enough. You can not see how much is going into her. It's not like it's a clear bottle with little tick marks at each ounce you can see draining. So, God totally used this verse to show me that He knows how much she is getting. He's weighed the oceans!!! He can measure things we can not! He knows how much she is eating! This was very comforting to me.

But of course, as a woman, I let my worry become louder than His comfort, and I began to call the doctor and read all the books etc. One morning before going to the doctor's office, I read v. 13-14 "Who is able to advise the Spirit of the Lord? Who knows enough to be his teacher or counselor? Has the Lord ever needed anyone's advice? Does he need instruction about what is good or what is best?" He was trying to remind me that He had already told me she is ok. But of course I had to get a second and third and fourth opinion. Finally, after so much searching, I came to understand that God was right in the first place. She was just fine! (She was actually just teething.)

V. 18 has constantly haunted me since this lesson "To whom, then, can we compare God? What image might we find to resemble him?" I had been comparing him to a doctor, or one of the millions of 'experts' who wrote all the child rearing books I had been reading. These have become my idols. I have his Spirit living in me! My best friend Janie has been telling me this since the very beginning of my pregnancy. I am not doing this alone, I have the Spirit of God inside of me. And I MUST trust that Spirit. I don't want any of you to be scared, I'm not denying the need for doctors or great 'expert' advice. I'm just learning to put them in their place - second to the creator of my little girl. I must trust His Spirit to gently guide me just as v. 11 has promised.

Well, just a few more reasons I think this chapter is written for parenthood. V.1 - "Comfort, comfort my people says your God"...this is the first few months of a new parent's life...comforting a newborn. And finally the last paragraph of the chapter, the last verse which is so familiar. I think I'm just going to write it all here.
"O Israel, how can you say the Lord does not see your troubles? How can you say God refuses to hear your case? Have you never heard or understood? Don't you know that the Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of all the earth? He never grows faint or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak. Even youths will become exhausted, and young men will give up. But those who wait on the Lord will find new strength. They will fly high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint."
I could cite many many more ways that in these early months God has used these verses. From naps times, to fussy times to fun times. But the main point is that God does understand what you are going through. There is no measuring the depth of His understanding.

If you made it this far in reading, I applaud you and thank you. I also want to thank Rachel for pointing this chapter out to me, and Janie for living this chapter out in front of me. I love you both.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Picture


Ok, so Bert had a picture on his phone I didn't know about of her watching the game. I want to follow up from that post and also let you all know that Temperance also likes watching water boil...if that says anything about the relative interest and excitement of basketball :P


Also, here's a picture of Temperance and her beautiful Aunt Rachel. Everyone comments on how much she looks like Rachel. I am so glad! They are both so beautiful!!!